I was feeling miserable and sorry for myself.
A woman rang, attempting to con me into some scheme. She sounded so defeated my heart bled for her. 1000’s kms away she was doing a job she hated just to make ends meet. It sounded like it was killing her.
Each one of us has our burden, our “ Cross to bear”. It may be a sick child, living in a country with little prospects, living with a body that is broken, living with a hateful family.
Her hopelessness reminded me that perhaps my path wasn’t so bad.
At least until I forget.
My forgetting occurs when I compare myself to others situations. I can’t see the trials of my neighbours, their struggles are often invisible. I can’t look into their past or futures and see their tribulations. I don’t know their pain. Their lives seem perfect compared to mine. I’ve had many people comment on Caspian being odd – as he looks picture perfect. They don’t understand the invisible disease, epilepsy and what it has done to his body and mind. I frequently feel upset and angry as I have given myself too much to do and feel overwhelmed and wonder why people expect so much of me. I feel as though I should have a little button on my forehead that I could press saying ” dead on her feet woman walking”. My wounds are invisible but so are yours.
And so I compare myself and end up feeling sorry for myself.
From the fabulous Princess Bride both a book and a film.